Definitions of Friendship

"What is a friend? A single soul dwelling in two bodies". - Aristotle

Perhaps the one relation that has survived the trials and tribulations of time and has still remained unconditional is friendship. A unique blend of affection, loyalty, love, respect, trust and loads of fun is perhaps what describes the true meaning of friendship between two individuals. Similar interests, mutual respect and strong attachment with each other are what friends share between each other. These are just the general traits of a friendship. To experience what is friendship, one must have true friends, who are indeed rare treasure.

Different people have different definitions of friendship. For some, it is the trust in an individual that he / she won't hurt you. For others, it is unconditional love. There are some who feel that friendship is companionship. People form definitions based on the kind of experiences they have had. This is one relation that has been nurtured since times immemorial. There are famous stories about friends in mythologies of different religions all over the world. They say a person who has found a faithful friend has found a priceless treasure.

Psychologically speaking, friendship may be defined as "a dynamic, mutual relationship between two individuals. As children become friends, they negotiate boundaries within which both partners function". This helps them to function like healthy individuals in life as they learn to draw a line as and when needed in a relation. This greatly helps in the emotional development of an individual. However, any relation needs constant nurturing and development from all the people that are involved in one. Friendship cannot survive if one person makes all the effort to sustain it without any mutual recognition from others.

Since friendship starts the moment a child starts socializing, the kind of friends that the child chooses should be taken care of till the time he / she learns to differentiate between right and wrong. Wrong peers or lack of socializing can lead to severe psychological traumas and disorders, finally leading to social maladjustment. The correct peer group is essential for the development of the personality of a child. Both positive and negative experiences refine the personality of the individual. Thus it is essential that you find friends who are compatible with you on an emotional and psychological basis.

What is Real Love?

Real Love: The Love We’ve All Been Looking For — Unconditional Love

We've heard songs about it, seen it in the movies, heard it talked about on Oprah by relationship experts, and read about it in thousands of self help books. But, what is unconditional love? We all want to feel loved. We think about it, hope for it, fantasize about it, go to great lengths to achieve it, and feel that our lives are incomplete without it. The lack of unconditional love is the cause of most of our anger and confusion. It is no exaggeration to say that our emotional need for unconditional love is just as great as our physical need for air and food.
It is especially unfortunate, then, that most of us have no idea what unconditional love really is, and we prove our ignorance with our horrifying divorce rate, the incidence of alcohol and drug addiction in our country, the violence in our schools, and our overflowing jails
Our misconceptions of unconditional love began in early childhood, where we saw that when we did all the right things—when we were clean, quiet, obedient and otherwise “good”—people “loved” us. They smiled at us and spoke in gentle tones. But we also saw that when we were “bad,” all those signs of “love” instantly vanished. In short, we were taught by consistent experience that love was conditional, that we had to buy “love” from the people around us with our words and behavior

So what’s wrong with conditional love? We see it everywhere we look, so what could be wrong with it? Imagine that every time you pay me fifty dollars, I tell you I love you. We could do that all day, but at the end of the day would you feel loved? No, because you’d know that I “loved” you only because you paid me. We simply can’t feel fulfilled by love we pay for. We can feel loved only when it is freely, unconditionally given to us. The instant we do anything at all to win the approval or respect of other people—with what we say, what we do, how we look—we are paying for the attention and affection we receive, and we can’t feel genuinely loved.

A New Definition of Love: Real Love

There’s only one kind of love that can fill us up, make us whole, and give us the happiness we all want: unconditional love or true love. It is unconditional love that we all seek, and somehow we intuitively realize that anything other than that kind of love isn’t really love at all—it’s an imitation of the real thing.

Unconditional love—true love—is so different from the kind of love most of us have known all our lives that it deserves both a name—Real Love—and definition of its own: Real Love is caring about the happiness of another person without any thought for what we might get for ourselves. It’s also Real Love when other people care about our happiness unconditionally. It is not Real Love when other people like us for doing what they want. Under those conditions we’re just paying for love again. We can be certain that we’re receiving Real Love only when we make foolish mistakes, when we fail to do what other people want, and even when we get in their way, but they don’t feel disappointed or irritated at us. That is Real Love (true unconditional love), and that love alone has the power to heal all wounds, bind people together, and create relationships quite beyond our present capacity to imagine.

What we Do Without Real Love: Imitation Love

If we don’t have enough Real Love in our lives, the resulting emptiness is unbearable. We then compulsively try to fill our emptiness with whatever feels good in the moment—money, anger, sex, alcohol, drugs, violence, power, and the conditional approval of others. Anything we use as a substitute for Real Love becomes a form of Imitation Love, and although Imitation Love feels good for a moment, it never lasts and never gives us the feeling of genuine happiness that Real Love provides.

Most people spend their entire lives trying to fill their emptiness with Imitation Love, but all they achieve is an ever-deepening frustration, punctuated by brief moments of superficial satisfaction. All the unhappiness in our lives is due to that lack of Real Love and to the frustration we experience as we desperately and hopelessly try to create happiness from a flawed foundation of Imitation Love. The beauty of Real Love is that it ALWAYS will eliminate our anger, confusion, and pain. So how do we find this universal cure?

Finding Real Love

As people learn the principles of Real Love, they almost uniformly ask how they can find and feel the real thing. They want to feel the actual power of Real Love.
Fortunately, there are so many course of actions we can take to find Real Love and experience its healing power.

1. Study. Read the book Real Love. Watch the Essentials of Real Love as as part of monthly membership or on the six-DVD set. The more we study these true, lifegiving principles, the more we tend to feel the power that emanates from them.
2. Participate in the chat rooms as a member of RealLove.com. There you can tell the truth about yourself and feel the acceptance of other members. At pre-specified times during the week you will have free access to trained Real Love Coaches in the chat rooms. The service provided by these coaches would cost you over $100 an hour on other websites. But we’re providing this service to our members for FREE. We want everyone to experience the life-changing benefits of Real Love Coaching. This unique benefit will help you find the answers to the important questions in your life and relationships.

3. Participate in the weekly video chat as a member of RealLove.com. Each week you’ll have an opportunity to participate in an online group where people share their lives and their acceptance of one another. This group is moderated by Dr. Baer.
4. Hire a Real Love Coach. Many people have found the guidance of a professional coach indispensable as they learn and apply the principles of Real Love. You can learn more about coaching at RealLoveCoaching.net.
5. Join a Real Love Group. If one is not available, take the steps to form one. Share the Real Love book or the Essentials DVDs with friends, and as you do that, you will naturally find people who express an interest in the principles of Real Love. Gradually, you can ask these people if they have an interest in joining you in a Real Love study group.
6. Gradually accumulate a group of people that you can communicate with by phone or in person every day. Make a habit of communicating with at least one person every day who is capable of loving you unconditionally. You will find these people as you take the steps described above.
7. Attend Real Love seminars as you find them listed on the website at Upcoming Events.
As you take these steps, and tell the truth about yourself to other people—especially about your mistakes, flaws, and fears—they can finally see you as you really are. They can accept you and give you unconditional love, as indicated in this simple diagram:
Truth- Seen -Accepted- Loved
When you feel enough of the unconditional love of others, you'll have the most important treasure in life. The wounds of the past will heal—wounds caused by insufficient Real Love—and you'll feel whole and happy. As your emptiness and fear are eliminated by Real Love, you'll simply have no need to use Getting and Protecting Behaviors Without those behaviors, you'll find relationships with others relatively effortless and will begin finding the happiness you've always wanted.
We have now seen the powerfully healing effects of Real Love in the lives of tens of thousands of individuals. Impossibly unhappy marriages now thrive, angry and rebellious children now turn to their parents for love and guidance, singles are finding partners interested in a relationship based on Real Love instead of trading in the sure disappointment of Imitation Love, and divisive and unproductive corporate cultures are become nurturing and supportive. Today to get the relationship advice and self help that will help you replace your anger, confusion and addictions with peace, confidence, and happiness.
If you would like to learn more about the benefits of Membership on RealLove.com, sign up for a 15-day Free Trial Membership There is absolutely no obligation to upgrade to a full membership, though most people find that they just can't get enough Real Love!

Friendship Day Activities

Friendship Day is an occasion that calls for celebrating the presence of friends in our life. Given here are some Friendship Day celebration ideas to help you make the occasion a memorable one. The idea behind the Friendship Day activities listed here is have fun on the occasion and to make your friends feel how special they are in your life! In case you too know of a good friendship party idea please send it to us and help us enhance this biggest web site on Friendship Day.

Friendship Activities and Ideas of Celebration
A simple idea would be to write a nice card for your friend telling them how much you appreciate their friendship. Please be open in your expression and spill out your heart to them!

To touch your friend's heart buy or make them a small present such as flowers, chocolates, friendship bands, a cake, or anything that your friend will appreciate! And how about leaving the gift anonymously for added intrigue!

Give a warm hug to your friend and let them that have a special place in your heart!

Make it a point to call or SMS every one of your friends, old and new, on Friendship Day to let them know you care.

Write your friend a web page to express your friendship online .

Ring up a radio station and dedicate a song to Friendship Day and your friends!

A wonderful idea would be to make some new friends on the occasion by becoming a doer of RAOK - Random Acts of Kindness .

Buy your friend a ticket to the theatre so you can enjoy a great show together. If you can't afford this, downscale to the movies!

Give your friend a Friendship Bracelet (made or bought) to symbolize your friendship.

Grab a camera or visit a photo studio and take some photos of you and your friends enjoying yourselves! This is beautiful way to preserve memory.

More Thoughtful Friendship Activities
Prepare a CD or a cassette that features all the songs that define your friendship or ones that you just happen to mutually like!

Submit a Friendship Tribute to your friend to be posted on the web.

Do call all those old friends you haven't spoken to in ages. Remember the girl scout motto - "Make new friends and keep the old, one is silver and the other gold"!

Send your dear friends an online Friendship greeting and add a special message.

Make a special friendship book for your best friend. You may include photos, quotes and poetry telling your friends how special they are.

Invite your closest buddies over for a sleepover! Rent some movies, plan out games and arrange for chips, chocolate, cold-drinks and other goodies! If possible bring some blankets outside and watch the stars.

You may also plan a special day with your best friend or friendship group. A picnic is always a fun idea, and great for all ages. If your group loves adventure you may plan activities such as bowling, golf, boating, river-rafting, cricket or going to the beach.

If you are all busy during the day, plan to go out to dinner with your friends. Dress up in your finest and have a fun night that's different and rocking.

If possible host a Friendship Dinner Party at your home!

Making New Friends

Solitude is enjoyed by any individual. Spending time with oneself and indulging in some fruitful introspection is something that many people crave for, but unfortunately do not find time for the same. However, when this solitude becomes loneliness, it can get problematic. Finding new friends is not at all difficult provided you keep an open mind and be confident of yourself. Always remember that tomorrow's friends are in fact today's strangers. So if you are looking for tips for making new friends, read further. We bring some ideas and suggestions for how to make new friends.

To make new friends, the first thing you need to do is, meet up with new people. This should be quite simple as your neighborhood should have a club, school or any other small organization. Go there and talk to people. You will be surprised to see the response you get. Don't be too haughty or condescending. It is far more important to be nice than be interesting. So once you get into a social circle or group, making friends is not tough at all.
Look approachable. You need not dress up in dandy clothes or wear loud make up to attract people. More than artificial make up, simplicity attracts people. Smile often, make eye contact, don't look too tensed and listen to what others have to say.

Accept people the way they are. Unnecessary fault finding, critically analyzing each and every individual will not work if you want to make new friends. No one is perfect; you are not either. Everyone has faults and the way to make friends is by looking at the positive aspects of the individual. In case you don't like someone's behavior, it is better to avoid than create a rivalry.

Try to keep your communication channels open. Don't sit back relax and expect lasting friendships to occur. It requires communication from both sides. So call up people you have just met, email old friends who have moved away, drop in occasional sms just to say hi. You will be pleasantly surprised at the responses that you get.

Show people you are reliable and can be trusted. In a new group, ask if you could something to drink or invite someone over. Exchange phone numbers and don't forget to call up. Remember, it is essential to take the first step to begin the journey of an ever lasting friendship. When someone entrusts you with a work, give it your best shot.

Last but not the least, don't forget old friends. If they have moved away or if you have moved away, be in touch with occasional phone calls and emails. Don't leave old friends for the sake of new ones.

True Friendship

What is a true friend? Often, I have struggled to understand what makes one person there, truly, more than the next. We all go through life with different people by our sides at different times in our lives. But some people distinguish themselves. They are true friends.
There are times in all of our lives when we need the comfort and solace of someone who understands completely, and for some reason, continues to help us when we are at our worst, perhaps even exhausting them.
To me, a true friend understands. Not the kinds that say they will be there for you and then are purposely. They are the kind that say they’ll be there, then are, and amaze you with how devoted they really are.
Going through a time of crisis reveals that your real friends are. It’s not to say that those who are not there for you in these bad times are not good people or good friends. But you get to see their true dedication and moral character when you face adversity.
But your real, true, friends are the ones who come through with flying colors, when you do not even have to ask. There is something magical about the bonds of true friendship. Though you may not have many kinds of these people in your life, be thankful for the ones who are there. The people in our lives are a blessing.
When going through rough times, don’t expect everyone to understand—you will just be let down more if they do not. Reach out to your friends if you want them to understand, and give them the opportunity to help. (They aren’t mind readers!)
If you do not find someone to understand, you know that the person has not defined themselves in your eyes as the kind of person who will be there through thick and thin.
You can still value people in your life who are not “till the end” friends. These people have just as much to offer, and it should be said that each person in your life is there for a reason. If a friend just does not get the idea that you need him or her, try and understand what that person is going through, or how they view the relationship. Don’t be afraid to confront your friend to see if everything is okay. And most of all, don’t expect everyone to run to your aid. Everyone is busy with his or her own lives.

Old Friendship

It is easy to find friends but very difficult to maintain them for a long time. Some people are blessed to have friends who stick to each other through thick and thin and never ever break the relation with time or distance. Others take time to open up with people and some others don't feel confident about themselves at all. Long lasting friendship does not happen in a day. It takes years to develop and needs equal efforts from both sides to make it work. Some childhood friendships actually develop into long lasting friendship since it is a result of mutual understanding and undeterred trust.

People swear by the power of old friendship. The fact that there is always a trusted friend to fall back upon in times of need is very re-assuring. Friends who have been with each other through highs and lows; friends who have seen each other fail and rise again; friends who have seen each other laugh and cry and yet stood by each other accepting the good and the bad points are true friends who can maintain long lasting friendship. The bond that is formed is so strong that even long distance cannot deter it.

Childhood friendship is usually formed when the young kid gets to know his immediate classmates and neighbors. Though they fight and cry at first like other normal kids, with time the true friends begin to emerge from fair weather friends. The secret to long lasting friendships is not giving up on each other. It is inevitable that they grow up, form their opinions, have different temperaments and attitudes and possibly have different lifestyles. Yet, they hold onto each other and respect each other's opinions and attitudes. In a way, they compliment each other. They say true love is rare, but finding a true friend who stays around forever is something that life offers to very few.

Friendship Day Celebrations

Friendship Day truly calls for celebrations and is the perfect occasion to let your friends know how they are and how cherished is their friendship. It is celebrated all over the world with much delight and grandeur. Today the celebrations have gained so much popularity that we also have a friendship ambassador - Winnie the Pooh. No matter how busy you are, take out time from your schedule to spend time with your friends. In case you are thinking of how to celebrate Friendship's Day, you will find many Friendship Day celebration ideas given below.

Camping Out

Take your friends along and plan a camping trip. Explore the outdoors with your friends and you can do a plenty of activities like have a bonfire, go trekking, etc. Camping out in the open environment will make sure you have plenty of time in hand and have fun exploring new things together.

Organize a Friendship Day Party

It is the time to celebrate and show everyone how special is your friend. Organize a party for the sake of friendship and splurge upon everything; right from the invitations to the décor to the party favors. Raise a toast for your friendship and prepare everything that your friend likes. Your friend will not forget this party for a lifetime!

Catch up on a Movie

What better way to celebrate Friendship Day than watching a nice movie together with friends. If there is a good movie playing in the theaters, you can go there with your friends and also have lunch or dinner outside. If not, then you can get some cute movie DVDs on friendship and watch it at the comfort of your home.

Recollect Old Memories

Call your friends over and go through your albums. Recollect fond memories of childhood and how you became friends. Take a walk down the nostalgic lane and recollect fond memories like your first fights, amusing sleepovers, your first movie together, crushes, etc.